Morjes!

Welcome to my blog. I write about fitting in, sticking out, and missing the motherland as a serial foreigner.

Grad student mom

I've been a grad student/mom for a few weeks now. So far, so good. It still feels amazing to throw off the motherhood mantle for a few hours each week. I keep waiting for someone to show up at the classroom door, scan the assembled students, single me out, and tell me sorry, it was all a joke, it turns out I am actually not allowed to sit there and learn about things that fascinate me and enrich my mind.

The contrast between my mom and student selves is especially stark on the days I bring the girls with me to campus, pass them off to Jeremy at his office, and go straight to class from there. It has been a long, long time since I needed to be anywhere at a specific, regular time, just for ME. Maybe a doctor's appointment or two over the last few years? I'm still nervous that I'll be late to class and then I end up trying to hustle the girls along faster than they're able. Then Miriam gets to lagging behind and I'm trying to hurry her up and by the time I hand them over to Jeremy, it takes the entire walk from there to my class to focus on not looking like a harried mom when I walk in the door.

I'm so glad I kept up on reading high-level non-fiction over the years. It makes the textbooks infinitely more readable. However, my attention span has definitely taken a hit. I am so conditioned to being interrupted by tiny children at random intervals during any important task that when I do find a stretch of time to study, I find myself looking up after 12 minutes wondering if anything out there needs my attention.

Today I did my homework outside while the girls played. Miriam asked me what I was doing and when I told her I had homework, too, just like her, she got such a kick out of it.

I'm still moderately terrified of a thesis and I know I have a lot of coursework to get through in the next couple of years, but it feels so good to build character and be challenged in a way that does not involve poo, snot, or time-outs. Who's with me?

March 4th, outsourced

Eternal sunshine